The Baby Predictor

We had some of Dave's coworkers over for dinner on Friday night. This was a pretty Chinese crowd, which is always fun. Discussions about whether or not you can eat broccoli raw and stories about feeding crabs to the pigs bounce over the table and the piles of food. Dave announced the baby at dinner that night as well, which received much excitement and many questions.

We also learned that the Chinese can predict the sex of the baby. A particularly urgent need in a country where ultrasound technicians are forbidden by law from revealing the sex of the baby. Nina shared a spreadsheet with these inputs: Month of conception and Mother's actual age at the date of conception plus 9 months. Apparently, these inputs have made accurate predictions among Uncle H--'s new babies over the last year - 100% accurate. This is over a sample size of only 4. Still, when we looked back at our two babies, the predictions were correct. That brings us to 6 out of 6 - still 100%!

So, all you Mamas, we need your help. Let's put the predictor to the test. Try to remember your details, and post the accuracy in a comment. Dave's hoping to discredit the thing - it says we're going to have another girl!

生男生女圖 Boy or Girl? 中國在七百年前的皇家墓地裡發現了這幅生男生女圖。 這幅圖現在保存在北京科學院。它已被成千上萬的人所證實。據說其準確達99%。 豎行﹕懷孕的月份 橫行﹕年齡 (懷孕時的歲數 + 9個月) 交叉處即為結果 (男孩或女孩) 網主及一些朋友們測試近20個小孩，全部正確。讓人驚嘆﹗您不妨試試。

男 Boy = 女 Girl = Mother's actual age at the date of conception plus 9 months "母親年齡" /懷孕月份 Month of Conception 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 1月 Jan 2月 Feb 3月 March 4月 April 5月 May 6月 June 7月 July 8月 Aug 9月 Sept 10月Oct 11月Nov 12月Dec

Talking Plane Trips

We haven't been home in a long time.

Our family traveled to the states for Christmas last year, and stayed for a lovely 6 weeks. We returned at the end of January, and have not returned again since. Dave and I each made quick trips home, but the girls have been consecutively in Asia. Grammy and Grandpa came to visit in May, as did Nana and Poppa. Now we're coming upon 6 months without any family. That's a long time - especially for the under 5 set.

Here's the trouble.

We're really hoping that the State Department will ask Dave to begin training for his new job in either February or March. Really hoping. We'd rather deliver the baby in the states, near family and in a more comfortable environment. We'd love to attend Dave's family reunion in May. Dave's sick of his current job, and excited to begin the new one. So many reasons.

Trouble is, we just don't know what will happen.

So, here's the travel plans:

We will stay in Shanghai for Christmas.
Sad to not spend Christmas surrounded by family and old friends, together in the grandparents' homes, with snow on the ground and Christmas movies cycling through the cable stations. But pretty exciting to have Christmas in our own home, under our own tree, at our local church, on a schedule completely surrounding our sugarplum-envisioning children.

We will be in the states in either February or March.
Ideally, we will be moving to DC for Dave to begin training on March 29th (or Feb. 14th - even better!). By mid-January, it should become clear whether or not this will happen. If not, we will book a trip home for a few weeks surrounding Chinese New Year (Feb. 14). This decision would coincide with placing Dave on the Do Not Call List, a decision to stay in Shanghai until summer.

We promise not to keep our kids away from their family for any longer - a potential 14 months is too long already! But please join us in rooting for the March class, and keeping those international flights to a minimum!

**Clarification
Dave has NOT received his security clearance.
His investigation is finished - this is a good milestone. No one will be making phone calls or digging up anymore dirt.
But he has not received his security clearance. He has entered a nasty little purgatory called adjudication. As far as I can tell, Adjudication is where people keep putting off making a decision on whether or not they trust you. It can take months for them to look over the already collected information and decide whether or not to offer Security Clearance.
He has cleared a milestone, but only a minor one. Once he receives Security Clearance, we expect life to intensify mighty quickly.

Hairy Crab

We've had a lovely autumn in Shanghai. October stayed warm throughout, with golden sun inviting us onto parks every Saturday and warm evenings pulling us onto our balcony for dinner almost every night. Halloween saw a high temperature of 81F, and also the end of our Indian Summer. The high today will be only 52F, and the girls went to school in sweaters.

Autumn in Shanghai means hairy crab season. Allow me to explain by excerpting from the San Francisco Chronicle:

It's October, and if there is any local food that defines Shanghai it is the freshwater hairy crab. These freshwater crustaceans, originating from within about a 100-mile radius of the city, fatten as soon as the first autumn wind chills the Yangtze River delta. Although the official season opened in late September, aficionados await the first autumn chill after the mid-autumn full moon festival (usually by mid-October), so they may relish the fattest, most roe-laden crabs.

From now until mid-February, crab feasting dominates the local scene. Crab vendors ply the gray-colored crustaceans in every neighborhood and every street corner. Restaurants offer crab specialties on their menus. Entire 10-course banquets, with each course being a variation, riff on the theme of crab.

Dave's co-workers joined us for an American BBQ on Friday night. I made potato salad and Dave grilled sausages and chicken wings. The girls made jack-o-lantern cookies for dessert. And knowing that we would prepare American food, a few of his coworkers picked up a box of live crabs on the way home.


Mark is the foodie of the crowd. He prepared each crab, by removing its plastic tags and setting it inside the wok to steam for 20 minutes.


These ugly creatures turned a lovely autumn shade of red once they were steamed, and eventually stopped banging their claws against the top of the pan. No pictures of us eating, because the party did stay on the rooftop balcony, lit only by the night sky. As you would expect, Dave ate it. I tried a bite of the roe - supposed to be the best part. It seemed like far too much trouble to both Dave and I, as you have to really dissect these little buggers to get a few tasty morsels out. But the rest of the crew had a blast tearing these crab apart, and sucking out the guts.

The hit of the evening, though? The Jack-O-Lantern cookies, decorated with help by the girls. Apparently Dave's co-workers have a serious sweet tooth, because these cookies are generally much too sweet for a Chinese palate. But all cookies had disappeared by the end of the evening!

Bragging Rights

Moving a lot can be really crummy, because it means that through our lives we will certainly leave behind many very good friends.

It also means that we will meet many, many incredible people.

I am proud to have been close friends with the man described here.

I am only sad that I am not hearing his good news from his own mouth, but from another friend's website, along with the news of his second child. Such is life.

But at least if we're gonna change friends every few years, we've got the advantage of being able to track many of them online.

Congratulations, Eric!

Another Writer in the Family

Lilly wrote a story this evening. I mean, she conceived of the story, she decided upon the letters, and she wrote it herself.

If we had a scanner, I would show it to you.

Here is what she wrote:

LILLYWORNECLSTOSHONTLPAWFHRSOCMO.

Allow me to add some vowels and spaces:

LILLY WORe a NECklaSe TO SHOw aNd TelL and PlAyed WiF HeR SOCk MOnkey.

We had brunch with her teacher from last year, the amazing woman behind The Woman Center. She encouraged Lilly to be a brave writer, coming up with her words and letters all by herself to tell a story. Lilly took those instructions fully to heart, and wrote a story. I am a proud Mama tonight.

Filling My Days

With Sophia beginning school this year, I thought I would have so much time on my hands. I worried, in fact. I worried that I would be bored and lonely, no longer constantly surrounded by children.

And so, I began to volunteer. Partly because of those fears. Partly out of a strong desire to begin putting my time and energy toward something outside of myself. That social worker side of me was calling to come out again, so I let her.

And now I am working on so much that I hardly have time to nap every afternoon! Everything I'm involved in is really quite exciting. I'm sad to think that I'll be leaving it behind in less than a year. Take a look!

Bible Study:
I host a weekly Ladies Bible Study in our home. I have been hosting for nearly a year now, and I love it. Our group of ladies has changed dramatically from last year. And throughout the group, I constantly find it a refreshing and uplifting group of women who I cherish spending time with every week. Further, we are now in our second Beth Moore study. And what a treat! Our group is diverse, with ladies from different nations and different religious backgrounds. But each of us finds Beth Moore's studies challenging and interesting. We each find our faith deepened, and find the Bible newly interesting. We are currently studying The Tabernacle of the Old Testament. I was skeptical - how can this be interesting? But my goodness, it is! What a treat!

The Giving Tree:
I have taken a key role in administering a holiday program this year - much like the Holiday Friends program I ran when I worked at Beyond Housing. The Giving Tree matches expat organizations (primarily International Schools, but also large corporations and social clubs) with schools for children in need throuh Shanghai. Donors receive a shopping bag assigned to a specific child. They fill that bag with new coats, shoes and toys. They shop as if for Christmas, but they deliver as if for Chinese New Year. Its a lovely system, an easy sell to donors, and a wonderful way for expats to help out this community. We remain so separate from the local community during the year, that people seem quite eager to give back.

Music Together and Half the Sky Foundation:
This is the project which has captured my heart. I am working with a small and committed group of volunteers to bring the music into the orphanages of China. We hope to tailor the Music Together program to an orphanage setting, which is easily done. The biggest challenge will be crossing the language gap, and figuring out funding and support. But we've already crossed the first challenge. Through Half the Sky Foundation, we will run two trial classes in an orphanage in Changzhou. Half the Sky's premise of providing a stable and nurturing adult for every child in the orphanage pairs perfectly with Music Together's concept of teaching music through participation and modeling. Every child deserves to have music fill their days - maybe especially a child living in an orphanage.

And Sophia only goes to school 3 mornings per week - for 3 hours each hit! Photography has taken the backseat. You'll notice this blog has, too. Because lets face it - I'm not giving up that afternoon nap!

Visualize Whirled Peas

Since many of you got a kick out of Lilly's story a few days ago, I thought I'd add another one. On a recent evening, the girls and I were playing and singing songs. We were singing the Bible song,

I've got peace like a river,
I've got peace like a river,
I've got peace like a river in my heart.

We'd been singing it off and on for quite a while, before Lilly asked a question.

In this song, are they talking about peas, the vegetable? Or are they talking about the pees that come out of your vulva?